Expect An AWESOME Post, Just Not Now.

i have an AWESOME post, really I do. But I have some photo uploading to do, and well, I just don't have it in me right now. So, I promise to have an AWESOME post. . . at some point in the near future.

Who's On First?

Remember the Abbott and Costello skit of "Who's on First"? Yeah, that's pretty much how my conversation with my mom went yesterday while we were shopping at Costco. Here's how it played out:

Me: "Oohh, look at those cute umbrellas!"

Mom: "Yeah, they're on sale."

Me: "Oh really? How much are they?"

Mom: "Five dollars."

Me: "They're on sale for five dollars?"

Mom: "Yeah. For one."

Me: "But there are two in here."

Mom: "Yeah, I know. They're 5 dollars each."

Me: "So, they're 10 dollars?"

Mom: "No, they're 5 dollars."

Me: "Five dollars? But it's originally 20 dollars."

Mom: "Yeah. But it's on sale for 5 dollars."

Me: "They are 5 dollars? Five dollars for two umbrellas?"

Mom: "What's the big deal, Corinne? It's just 15 dollars!"

Me: "What?! You just said that they were FIVE dollars!"

Mom: "Off."

Me: "Huh?"

Mom: "Five dollars off."

Me: "You said they were five dollars."

Mom: "Yeah, I meant they're 5 dollars off."

"Tylenol Is A Safe Drug"

It's Red Ribbon week at school. I now have to explain every pill I put into my face portal. And assure them that the liquid I'm washing it down with is "OK" to take medicine with and is advised/approved by the medicine manufacturer.
Holy Moly! It's like they can hear the rattle of Ibuprofen from blocks away and run to the kitchen to make curtain that their mother is not a "druggie".
Well, at least my girls are enthusiastic about being Drug Free. That's a good thing, but I wish they'd ease up so I can take a Tylenol for the headache they're giving me.

Homeward Bound - Maybe

Mikaela was home sick on Thursday. Laila seemed okay with it. She went to school and seemed perfectly happy. I saw her in the nurses office midday. I didn't get a call saying that I needed to take her home, so I figured everything was okay. I later saw her in the cafeteria, and again, she seemed happy and healthy. After my shift was over, I went to Bailey's middle school and spent the next FOUR HOURS there for parent/teacher conferences (but that's another story). So anyway, when I finally get home, I asked Laila how school was. And this is what she said:

"Do you know that I went to the nurses office twice with a sore throat today, and I couldn't even manage to get myself sent home?!"


That's my little girl.

Torture By Lip Gloss

Have you ever let a 3 year old apply lip gloss? On YOUR mouth? It's like Chinese Water Torture.

So there I am, minding my own business, when Sophia comes to me with her lip gloss cell phone. "See my phone, mama? It'sh make-up."

"Yes, I see."

"You want shum?"

Eying the gooey, glittery, jelly gunk separated by tiny trays all conveniently packaged in a slim cell phone looking container, I say, "Ah, no. It's okay, baby."

"Kummon, mama. It'sh okay. Give me your mouff."

"Ah, okay. Just a little bit," I consed. This is Sophie's cue to smear as much of that gelatinous goop across my lips, pass my lip line up towards my cheek, and back toward my nose, all while I grimace, whimper, and try to move my lips and face around so that I can minimize the facial goop slathering. I can feel the glitter scrapping my skin. It's making my skin crawl.

"DON'T MOOF!" Sophie yells.

"O-kay", I whimper out.

"There!" Sophie stands back to admire her handy work with a big grin.

I, on the other hand, am left feeling like I've been slimed by that green ghost thingy from Ghost Busters. I'm jutting my lips out in a weird contorted smile and resisting the urge to wipe all that junk off my face, because I know that if I do, she will only reapply. I must resist the urge until I can steal away to the bathroom, lock the door, and wet wipe my face.

You've won this round, Sophie.

It's Not A Tumor!

Mikaela has trouble remembering to hand in her homework, which is sad, considering she spends the time actually doing it every night. So, today Laila says to me, "Mama, Mrs. M. says Mikaela's not handing in her homework."

Turning to Mikaela, I say, "Mikaela, you need to remember to turn in your work."

"Well, it's not my fault. They forget to remind me," is her response.

"Mikaela," I say. "They don't have remind you. It's your job to turn in your homework."

"Well, maybe I have a brain tumor that makes me forget."

Okay. Only some of you actually "know" Mikaela. Those of you who do, know that she has a speech pattern that makes her sound like she's from New England or the East Coast area. Basically she drops her ending "R's" so when she said "tumor" it actually sounded like Arnold in Kindergarten Cop, when he says, "It's not a too-mah".

Seriously, I don't know what's wrong with my kids. Where do they come up with these things?

Corn Maze: Doux

We went to the Corn Maze last year and had a total blast. This year was just as fun, although we opted not to go through the maze because it had rained the day before and the maze was too muddy to meander through. But I think we made up for it in other activities:

The Drive: View of the Florida Mountains (pronounces Flor-ee-da) in New Mexico from my window:



The "Blackhole Slides":


Yeah, Sophie skidded to a halt right where you see her. Too light to carry her any further, I guess.

The Giant Tire Mountain:
You're only seeing the tip of the "iceberg", baby. Trust me when I say, it's GINORMOUS! Okay, maybe not "ginormous", but it's pretty big.

The Enormous Tire Obstacles:

Sophie's smile has gone from Anime to Popeye. Don't ask me why, because I don't know.
The Hay Ride:


Up close and personal with Bailey. Her response to my close up photo? "Uh, momma? How 'bout taking a proper picture of me?" Some people are so touchy.
The Pumpkin Patch: Brian helps the girls select a "perfect pumpkin".
Laila breaks from the group in search for a just right pumpkin.
Sophie found her pumpkin.


Surprising batch of Morning Glory throughout the pumpkin patch.
Bailey,"I found MY pumpkin."
We opted for one that we could actually carry back to the hay ride.
Getting Personal: The Out House. Surprisingly clean. Now, I try not to use any public restrooms at the best of times - if I can hold it till I can get home, I will. I will only use a port-a-potty when I ab-sol-utely HAVE TO. I had to go TWICE while there! Twice. I closed the lid to save you of the contents (although it was pretty clean). Your Welcome.

Sophie's version of lunch:

Sophie driving a tractor:

The Moo How's: Take my word on this, cow's stink, BAD.

Our Total Haul:

The Incredible Hunk

Laila: Here D, play with the Hunk

Me: HULK.

Laila: Huh?

Me: Huuuulk.

Laila: Huuuunnnk?

Me: No, HUUULLLLk.

Laial: HuuuullllNNNNK?

Me: No, no, no. It's HuLk.

Laila: What the heck is a HULNK?

Me: Hulk. The Incredible HULK, Laila.

Laila: The Incredible Hulnk? I thought it was The Incredible HUNK.